The Human Stain

9/5/09 Can of stain, returned to Lowes

As mentioned earlier (you can check out the Downsize post here), I think weather-sealing a deck is the most asinine activity known to man. (With the possible exception of showing up at a Health Care Town Hall meeting with an Obama photo doctored to look like Hitler. Put her in her place, Barney!)

This year, I stood out on our deck and yelled, "Enough!" I startled the cats - sorry about that, guys.

I needed to find another option, so I took the plunge and stained the deck. Actually, I think it looks great and Joanna is willing to back me up on that. However, during the process, I ran out of the factory-mixed colored stain I had purchased at Lowes in Auburn and ran down to Lowes in Windham (much closer) to get more. However, they did not have the pre-mixed stain in the color I needed. The woman in the paint department assured me she could mix it, using the same brand of base stain, to match perfectly.

Long story short: the stain I bought did not match at all. Fortunately, after a little test run in an obscure place, I realized I couldn't use the stain before I screwed up the whole project. Thus, I spent the next hour and a half driving to and back from the Auburn store, where I could buy the factory-mixed stuff. The deck did get finished, the stain all matches, and our house value went up another $20,000, I'm sure.

However, I was left with this bascially unused can of stain that was emblazoned with "NON-REFUNDABLE." As something of a natural hoarder, especially with home-improvement products, I would have usually tucked it away for some other staining project in the distant future. Ah, how I am changing.

Today, I lugged the can back to the Windham store, ready to put up a fight with the store manager or, if necessary, the corporate home office. I had visions of making a huge scene, perhaps turning the whole place into my own personal Town Hall meeting.

However, I was pleasantly surprised, as the woman in customer service quickly refunded my $25 and sent me on my merry way. Which was into the heart of the store, where I promptly spent sixty bucks. (Side note: It does appear that the Windham Lowe's employee base is not only overwhelmingly female, but also overwhelmingly under 25. You go, Lowes: buck those stereotypes.)

As far as I can tell, Lowe's current slogan is, "Let's build something together." Sounds oddly romantic, but today they impressed me enough that if they want to come over and help build that garage I mentioned yesterday, I'm totally game.